Eight Tips For Talking To Your Kids About The Sermon

While scrolling down my Facebook homepage today, I noticed a link posted by a friend of mine to this website.  What a great article!  I thought you all might benefit from reading it, too, so I'm copying and pasting for you.

*******

They sit there next to you and their feet don’t even hit the floor. You’re thinking, “What, if anything of this guy’s sermon is sinking into my kid’s head?” And with that little thought you’ve already decided not to engage your child about the sermon. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

Let me introduce you to the most important rule when talking to your kids about the sermon: They retain more than you think they do. The second most important rule is like it: They understand more than you think they do.

In the interest of these two truths I’m writing this brief guide on how to talk to your kids about a sermon. I’m writing it both as a preacher and as a parent of four boys under the age of 8. I’ve failed, succeeded, and failed some more at talking to my kids about Jesus. Hopefully the tips you find below will help you as they’ve helped me.

At the heart of the gospel is Jesus introducing us to his loving Father. In worship we get to make a similar introduction—we get to introduce our kids to Jesus. Don’t miss that opportunity.

1. Remember the outline. It doesn’t matter if you keep written notes or not. Remember the gist of what is being taught. If your pastor preaches for 40 minutes, then try to make a mental note of what you’ve covered at the 20 minute point. Don’t be discouraged if you can’t get every point. Get as many of the big ones as you can.

2. Know the one, main point. Every passage and every sermon—no matter what your pastor says—has a main point. Grab it when you see it go by and don’t let go. And as a word of caution, every preacher has a bad day. Sometimes the structure of the sermon looks like a piece of abstract art. If so, do the best you can. But don’t let the guy close in prayer without having a main point in your head.

3. How is Jesus the hero? Now that you have an outline and main point, make sure you have Jesus too. How was Jesus the hero of the sermon? Kids are incorrigibly self-centered—and so are a few adults. Make sure you have a ton to say about Jesus, no matter what the passage or where the preacher went with it. Without an emphasis on Jesus your little saints will grow up thinking that the Bible is all about them.

4. Engage your kids with open ended questions. You know the outline and you can keep to the main point. You know you’re going to talk a ton about Jesus. Now engage your kids with any kind of question you can think of… except ones that can be answered, “yes” or “no”. Here are some examples:

In the story questions: “What would have thought if you were an Israelite soldier and saw big ol’ Goliath walking up to little David?”

Emotions questions: “If you were blind, how would you feel if Jesus put his hands on your eyes and fixed them so they could see?”

Leading questions: “The rich young ruler was wrong because he thought he could earn God’s favor. Why is it silly to think we can earn God’s favor by doing enough good things?”

Action questions: “What would you have done if Jesus had made a hurricane turn into a cool breeze right in front of you?”

Application questions: “If Jesus has forgiven you, do you think you can forgive Tommy when he wings a Tonka truck at your head?”

Use your imagination questions: You know your kids best. Make up some questions.

5. Make sure the gospel is clear. Jesus died for sinners. It’s very simple and can get very complex. But no matter the passage, don’t you dare teach your kids moralism. Tell them that Jesus has done everything necessary for them to know that God is overjoyed with them. When you tell them to do something, feel something, or think something, show them how those things are motivated by God’s love and not by fear, guilt, or pride.

6. Be the first to pray and confess. Talking to your kids about the sermon is as much letting them watch you learn from the sermon as it is teaching them about the sermon. If the preacher is helping your congregation diagnose sin, show your kids how it affected you. You could say, “You know, sometimes, daddy struggles with being angry. And it’s then that I realize I really need Jesus.” And when it comes time to pray, let them pray after you. Model for them what it looks like for a Christian to talk to God.

7. Chase rabbit trails. Your kids will lead you down them. Go with them. You’ll find out a ton about how they think. And you may just enjoy the unexpected stroll off the beaten path.

8. Remember the first two rules. After all this, it may be you feel like it was a complete waste of time. It’s at that point you must remember the first two rules:

They retain more than you think they do.They understand more than you think they do.

And I promise you this, they will remember these times with you. They will forget a ton. But they won’t forget Sunday afternoons with daddy and mommy talking about Jesus.

By: Joe Holland

February 26th - What We Learned

This Sunday, February 26th, your Reign Forest child (ages 2-5) learned that they can talk to God ANYTIME, ANYWHERE! (Matthew 6:5-13)  They don't have to use special words like "Bless our bodies..." or "God is great, God is good..." or "Now I lay me down to sleep..." or "Our Father Who is in Heaven..."  They can simply talk to Him.

Your child learned how NOT to pray - you don't have to use special words or a special voice, and it's very important that you don't pretend to pray to God while you are really just hoping other people will hear and think you are extra special.

Your child also learned how TO pray - just talk in your normal voice the way you talk to someone you love very much.  You can tell God thank you for things He has given you or done for you.  You can talk to Him about whatever you are thinking, things you are happy about, things you are sad about, things you are scared about.  You can ask Him for things, and you will know that He always answers - sometimes He says "Yes," sometimes He says "No," and sometimes He says "Wait."  But He always gives you the answer that is BEST for you because HE LOVES YOU VERY MUCH.

Our memory verse for this month is  
Matthew 22:37
Jesus replied,         (point to your mouth)
'Love                      (hug yourself)
the Lord your God (point upwards)
with all your heart (place your hand over your heart)
and with all your soul (form an "O" with your hand on your chest)
and with all your mind. (point to your head)

Your child in Land of Promise (kindergarten through fifth grade) learned that we can even show HONOR to God by worshiping Him like King David did as the Ark of the Covenant made it's way back to Jerusalem (2 Samuel 6:12b-22a).  David was so excited that he honored God by dancing in the street in front of the Ark.  He didn't care who saw him.  He didn't care if anybody saw him.  He was just so glad that he couldn't hold it in.  In fact, his wife was so embarrassed about his ridiculous dancing that she told him later he wasn't acting like a king!

I can remember quite a few times when I have held back words of praise simply because others who did not love God might be offended by them or might roll their eyes and say, "There she goes again."  Holding back dishonors my Lord.  It prevents glory that He should have been given.  He is valuable to me, and I need to communicate that to Him!

Our memory verse for the month is Romans 12:10 - Be devoted to one another in love.  Honor one another above yourselves.  We honor God above ourselves when we consider praising Him to be more important than retaining the high regard of others.

At home, you can model Honoring God for your children by taking the opportunity during DRIVE TIME or during MEAL TIME to honor God yourself for the good things He did for you during the day instead of ranting about how you have been mistreated at work or making fun of someone you encountered in the day who didn't do as you would have done.  The old saying, "More is caught than taught," refers to the fact that children learn more by what they see acted out in your life than by what they hear you say to them about how to act.  You are the most powerful influence on your child's behavior, so honor God consistently yourself with your own words and actions!

February 19th - What We Learned

This Sunday, February 19th, your Reign Forest child (ages 2-5) learned that the second greatest commandment is to love others, and that the only way to love others is to allow Jesus to be in charge in your heart just like Saul in our story did.  (Matthew 22:34-40, Acts 9:1-30)  When God met up with Saul, who enjoyed being mean to people, Saul chose to let God be in charge of his heart, and he began loving people instead of being mean to them.  Another man named Ananias also had a choice to make: to love Saul even though Saul was mean to everyone.  When Ananias chose to love, God helped him teach Saul all about God and how to love others.

Our memory verse for this month is  
Matthew 22:37
Jesus replied,         (point to your mouth)
'Love                      (hug yourself)
the Lord your God (point upwards)
with all your heart (place your hand over your heart)
and with all your soul (form an "O" with your hand on your chest)
and with all your mind. (point to your head)

To help your child remember to love others at home, encourage her to start giving high fives to the people around her.  High fives are a way of saying things like "Way to go!"  "You're special!"  "Great job!"  "You're my friend!"  When she gives someone a high five, that person will know that she loves them, and she will be obeying God's command to love other people.


Your Land of Promise child (kindergarten through fifth grade) learned how important it is to honor those in authority through the story of Absalom's rebellion against his father King David (2 Samuel 15:1-16a, 18:5-7, 15, 31-33).  Absalom was one of King David's sons.  He was very handsome and had very long hair that he refused to cut.  He viewed his father as being a weak king, and he was sure that he could do a better job.  He began sitting at the gates of the city and intercepting people as they brought their grievances to King David for judgement.  Absalom would listen sympathetically to one side of the story, and tell the person privately that he was on their side.  "But unfortunately, I'm not the king, so..."  Then he would listen to the other side of the story and tell that person privately that he was on their side.  "But unfortunately, I'm not the king..."  Eventually, enough citizens wanted Absalom to be their king, so Absalom set up his castle in another city and declared himself king while his dad was still reigning.  King David realized he had to fight his own son to protect the people of Israel.  He gave orders to his men to stop Absalom but not to hurt him.

After one of the battles, Absalom galloped off into the forest to evade King David's soldiers, and his long hair got stuck in some branches.  His mule ran off, leaving him dangling in the tree.  The soldiers caught up with him and killed him in spite of their king's orders.  When King David heard the news he sobbed.  There is no happy ending for relationships lacking honor.

In class, the children were asked to think of someone over them who it was easy to honor and someone it is hard for them to honor.  They prayed together, asking God to help them show honor this week to the harder to honor person.

Our memory verse for the month is Romans 12:10 "Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves."

During DRIVE TIME one day, brainstorm with your child ways that he can show honor to those in authority over him.  Some ideas could be

• Smiling at the person instead of rolling his eyes
• Saying "Yes Sir" or "Yes Ma'am" and obeying right away (or specifying when he will be able to obey) instead of ignoring the person speaking to him
• Offering to help the person in some way
• Apologizing for past dishonor shown and promising to begin honoring the way God instructs
• Writing a list of things that are valuable about that person
• Stopping himself from saying things about that person in a way that he would not want that person to overhear
  

February 12th - What We Learned

This Sunday, February 12th, your Reign Forest child (ages 2-5) learned that the greatest commandment is to love God with all our hearts (Matthew 22:34-40).  To illustrate this concept, the class compared objects like baseball bats and balls to hats and coats, and they had to decide which set was more important.  Bats and balls are fun to play with, but hats and coats are more important because they keep us warm.  Cookies are great to eat, but vegetables are more important because they keep us healthy.  Just like those things, being nice to someone is very good, but loving God with all your heart is more important because when we love Him, He helps guide our hearts into all the other good things we can do for Him and others.

Our memory verse for this month is Matthew 22:37
Jesus replied, (point to your mouth)
'Love (hug yourself)
the Lord your God (point upwards)
with all your heart (place your hand over your heart)
and with all your soul (form an "O" with your hand on your chest)
and with all your mind. (point to your head)

To reinforce this lesson at home, at random intervals during the day when you are with your child, smile up at Heaven, open your arms wide as though you want to give God a hug, and proclaim, "I love you, God!"  Don't just pretend, really say it out loud to God.  Let your child copy your words and actions if he or she chooses. 


Your Land of Promise child (kindergarten through fifth grade) learned that we should honor others more than ourselves (I Samuel 18:1-4 & 5-9).  Prince Jonathan illustrated this concept perfectly when he cheered for his friend David's success instead of becoming jealous the way King Saul did.  Jonathan honored his friend David.

Your child learned that she shouldn't only honor adults or those in authority.  She can honor her friends, too.  Honor is defined as letting someone know that you see how valuable they really are.  She can honor her friends by cheering when they win a contest that she wanted to win, or by playing whatever game together that her friend wants to play instead of insisting on playing what she wants to play.  We as adults can honor our spouses, friends or co-workers in the same ways: by cheering and being genuinely happy when we hear that a friend gets to enjoy a sunny vacation in the middle of winter; by congratulating our co-worker who just won employee of the month - again; and by happily letting our spouse pick his or her favorite restaurant or TV show two times in a row (or even three times *gasp*).

Our memory verse for this month is "Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves." Romans 12:10

At church, the concept of honoring someone else was illustrated by a karate visual of bowing to your Sensai.  To keep the concept of honoring others fresh in your child's heart, begin playfully bowing karate-style to each other whenever you leave each other and see each other again - possibly even every time you enter or leave a room that the other person is in.  This could produce lots of laughter, and laughter is a great way to embed any lesson deeply!

February 5th - What We Learned

This Sunday, your Reign Forest child (ages 2-5) learned that Jesus showed His love for God by doing what God wanted Him to do (Luke 2:41-50). When His family left Jerusalem to return home after a feast, Jesus stayed behind at the temple to teach just like God wanted Him to do.

In class, we discussed ways that children can show God they love Him, and these are some of the answers they came up with: by helping other people, by singing or praying when they are in bed, by cleaning their rooms without being told, by obeying their parents right away. The four and five year old children were challenged to go home and clean their bedrooms as a surprise without being told. Then, when their parents ask, "Why did you do this?" they can tell them it was to show God how much they love Him.

Our memory verse for the month with hand motions goes like this:

Matthew 22:37 (cup hands around mouth)
Jesus said, (point to lips) 
"Love (hug yourself) 
the Lord your God (point upwards)
with all your heart (place your palm over your heart)
and with all your soul. (make an O with you hand and place it over your heart)
Love Him with all your mind. (point to your head)
Matthew 22:37 (cup hands around mouth)

To keep this lesson fresh in his mind, help your child point out each heart he sees this week. Whenever he finds one, say together "Love the Lord your God with all your heart!" You can continue to say the entire verse each time, if you wish.

Your Land of Promise child (kindergarten through fifth grade) traveled this Sunday with the prophet Samuel to the house of Jesse in search of the next king. (I Samuel 16:1-13) They found out that God doesn't see as the world sees; He looks inside at people's hearts. Samuel was shocked to find out that God chose David, a young boy from the fields, to be king rather than his handsome and seemingly prepared older brothers. Bottom Line: Honor those who are overlooked.

Our memory verse for the month is Romans 12:10 "Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves."

To help this lesson stick, encourage your child to look around whenever he enters a room. Ask him to find one person who seems to be alone or left out and find a way to honor that person. It could be by smiling at her, or inviting her to participate in the activities going on. It could be drawing a picture or making a Lego creation for her. Simply by being aware, you can honor those who are being overlooked.

Watch The February Preview Videos!

It's February!  And you guessed it, time for a focus change in our lessons. 

This month, the Reign Forest children (ages 2-5) will be learning all about God's greatest commandment:  "Love the Lord your God with all your heart."  They're not just learning what the commandment is; they will be learning all month HOW to love God with all their hearts bases on the example that Jesus gave us while He lived out that commandment during His life on earth.

In this two minute video, Kendra explains in more detail the importance of teaching our children now how to become people who passionately love God.


FL Preview : L.O.V.E (February 2012) from Orange on Vimeo.


Your children in Land of Promise (kindergarten through fifth graders) have also switched gears from Self-Control, last month's virtue, to Honoring Others, this month's virtue.  This month, Honor is being defined as "Letting someone know you see how valuable they really are."  People are not valuable because we value them but rather because God values them.  His opinion of a person matters, and our opinions need to match His in order to be accurate.

In this five minute video, Reggie walks us through the month's lessons and expands on how the concept of Honor has far-reaching affects.  I highly recommend that you watch it!

Preview: The Ultimate Challenge (February 2012) from Orange on Vimeo.